Recovery is Possible. Me and my little family are proof.

I went to Cedars at Cobble Hill during Covid and therefore no visitors were allowed. To be honest, my world was so small there likely weren’t many people who would have chosen to visit anyways. Over a decade living in an abusive relationship, suffering isolation from a move away from friends and family, and post partum depression - my addiction was like quicksand. I was drowning, bringing those still close to me under as well.  

The opportunity to go to treatment was a pivotal moment in my life, and an experience I will be forever grateful for.

There is, however, a great vulnerability in coming to terms with one’s addiction and the root causes of our suffering. A very personal self healing that looks and feels different for every individual. When I left treatment, with Covid lifting, the opportunities to gather at Cedars and celebrate life became available again, but I wasn’t ready. I was still doing the work within. It wasn’t until this past summer when I felt I had moved through my own personal healing journey that I was ready to bring my family into it. To start our healing journey together. Addiction was a family experience for me, and therefore I knew my recovery needed to be as well.

Each year Cedars hosts a summer BBQ to emphasis the value and importance of community. Three years ago I walked through the gates broken and entirely alone. This time I walked with the two people I love the most beside me. Those same pathways I had walked in solitude, I now walked holding my son’s little hand. My mom and her strong supportive presence beside me. Once walking in shameful silence, I could now hear my son sharing stories about the forest and the animals that lived in the trees.

In that moment I could feel it with every ounce of my being. I had come full circle.

This time at Cedars I was held in loving embraces from family and friends – listening to the sounds of carefree laughter – feeling safe, seen, and accepted. New memories were made that day, on those very same grounds. Shaking away the chains of shame and guilt and I was building on this foundation I’d created in recovery of a life filled with happiness and love.

We often hear that the opposite of addiction is connection, and I firmly believe this to be true. There is so much value in a connection to ourselves, our loved ones, and our communities. Today I have found myself again. I have rediscovered the way to love the ones closest to me with authenticity again. And I have found a way to live and thrive in the community around me again.

Recovery is possible. My little family and I are living proof.